26 July 2006

Panicville

Sometimes bad stuff happens to good people. That's why you should go over to A Mommy Story and give Christina a virtual hug. She and her dear husband had someone break into their house and they got robbed of some of their prized possessions, including a brand-new laptop...ouch.

Status update:
My house: filthy, including ants marching through the laundry room. Also a spilled gin and tonic that has gotten into far too many crevices to be cleaned up any time in the next century. Bring on more ants!!
My luggage: packed, including a bunch of stuff I am sure I will never need/wear for BlogHer. But I will look fabulous not wearing it. I also have a bottle of Tanqueray in there and about 8 limes. It pays to be prepared.
My emotional state: I am so excited that I feel like I have Pop-Rocks in my brain. I have started picking like mad again. I have a bit of skin on my lip that must simply be torn off or I will go crazy...I may not have lips left by the time I get to San Jose. Will the other BlogHers still love me lipless? Or will they say "Yep, there's that weirdo Suebob? We KNEW she would do something stupid like picking her lips off!"
Am I going to bring the laptop? This laptop? My little glowing white friend? With the utterly cool Red Stapler sticker on the front? Will it be 4 pounds of misery or 4 pounds of fun? I will decide on the way out the door. See you there. Or if I am not going to see you there, I most certainly (Robin, Des, WordGirl) wish I was.

25 July 2006

A little too Office Space for me

As always, there is good stuff on
Linkateria.


One of my best friends just found out that they, after having worked as hard as humanly possible for 5 years, is getting cut loose by their company. Not fired, yet - they can still do an "Office Space" and interview to keep their own job, if they can find a position...it just makes me so angry because I have seen them working nights and weekends and having no life because of their dedication.

The deal used to be that if you sacrificed your life for the company, you got the prize, which was a job that continued indefinitely. Now, not so much. Sacrifice your life and you can be sacrificed at any moment. Nothing personal - because no one gives a crap about you.

The cruelty of this life pisses me off. Gotta breathe deep and get back to my spiritual center - this is all an illusion that will pass in the blink of an eye. Blink!

24 July 2006

That men at BlogHer thing again

Update: the saga continues with Chase over at Taste the World. She disagrees with me, but that is ok. I know I am always right.

I have expressed my dismay that men are coming to BlogHer on several occasions, and I have gotten both shit and support for my opinion. As the grand event approaches, I still have the same view that I had in the beginning: I wish that it would be all-women.

I am happy, though, because I have learned something I never would have expected to learn while thinking about this subject: I have realized what White Privilege means. This is a concept that is bandied about on blogs dealing with race and feminism, and one that often attracts hateful, vituperative comments (see Nubian's posts on the issue at Blac(k)ademic). People just can't see the reality of privilege and get all bent out of shape when one group wants to segregate itself to do some important work without outsiders there.

I hadn't thought that much about it until I started wondering why men would come to a women's blogging event, then it all sprang up in front of me, fully formed and 3-D.

Here's what happened: I tried to get into the heads of men coming to BlogHer. Sure, some are coming for purely commercial purposes. But what is going on with the others?

The same stupid things that go through MY foolish white head when I think I can hang with people of color and somehow magically transmogrify into one of them:

I'm not like all those other white people.
I am cooler than that.
I am practically one of these people.
I understand them.
I have insights that make me special.
I appreciate their culture.
I like their music/food/dance/clothing.
They must like hanging out with me. They're always so nice to me!

It was like a slap on the head when this all became clear. If there ever was a time for rueful laughter, this was it. I understood! I have white privilege and they have male privilege and these two things behave in exactly the same way! We are so used to being seen as the norm, the accepted, that when someone doesn't want us around, we are baffled, hurt, mad..."But, but, but WHY? Why, when I am practically one of you?" That's our privilege talking.

These men think they can hang with us women because they are special, different, they are the kind of guys we would WANT to hang out with, not like those other guys. The blindness their privilege grants them is that they cannot see they ARE the other guys, just like I am all those other white people.

And yeah, since they are showing up, we will be nice to them, we will indulge them, and that will make them believe even more that they are practically one of us. But you know what? They aren't, and they won't ever be. Despite what we tell ourselves, males still occupy a privileged place in the world, and that alone is reason enough to create women-only spaces.

That forms the real basis of my objections to them coming to BlogHer - they aren't us, so why do we bother with this false front, this ruse? Can't there be ONE weekend for women?

Once again - either go all the way and make the thing a mixed bloggers conference, or make it what it was designed to be, all-women. Don't try to make everyone happy and hopelessly water it down. Seems simple to me.



Linkateria is hot today.

23 July 2006

Are you just too hot to blog?

I thought so. Tell me about it - how hot IS it there?

Here's how hot it is here - my laptop got so hot that the fan started making weird spinning wobbly noises and I had to shut it down for a while. And this ain't nothing, compared to some places. Like 119 in Woodland Hills yesterday. Is anyone still up for arguing with Al Gore? Didn't think so.



Mr. Stapler hurt his back so I spent the day at his house making minty lime coolers and watching him yelp every time he moved. Been there, done that, know how much it sucks. We sweated and napped and then got in the pool and slowly paddled around, absorbing the coolth.

I am back home with dog panting, the carpet un-hoovered (too hot), the lawn unmowed (I can't face it) and my toes newly painted a nice Trailer Park Red in anticipation of BlogHer.

I got a stroke of brilliance about BlogHer last night when I couldn't sleep (it was just too...guess...yeah, that). I could to to BlogHer naked. Not unclothed - give me some credit - I am not quite THAT weird. Naked as in without my laptop. Huh? A blogger without her laptop?

Well, shit, folks, can't I live without it for 3 days? Why do I need it? To blog? 90 percent of the people who read my blog will be there, and anyway, I think live blogging is usually about as boring as watching someone type.

It sounds delicious to me. Break free of blogging - at BlogHer. Perfect! Opinions? Will I regret my decision?

More fine links over at Linkateria

21 July 2006

Shut my mouth and paint me red...

(I have NO idea what that title means, but Carol Kelsey-Frilot, my wonderful co-worker, used to say it all the time.)

My sis has been visiting from Seattle this week. She works at a high school up there. Are you sitting down? Because she says the latest kid-trend is - get this - leaving price tags on clothes.

Yep, it isn't enough to wear expensive designer duds. Now you have to be able to show proof you bought them FULL PRICE. Crazy, no?

My mom had the perfect question: what happens when they need to be washed?

Update: apparently the Beeb was onto this months ago.

********

A new one on me: I was invited to a wedding next weekend. Normally, I would have to send my regrets, because I am going to be at BlogHer. But no. I wasn't invited to the actual wedding. I was invited to a webcast of a wedding. No shit. Here are the instructions, condensed for your viewing pleasure (my comments in bold):
Hello,

Your Friend Who Never Calls You Even Though You Leave Lots of Messages and His Fiancee You Have Never Met have listed you as potential online guests for their wedding. In order to ensure that you are able to view the wedding, we have put together the following tutorial.

1. At least a day or two before the wedding, if possible, visit our website at www.chapelofexploitativeinternetlove.com and click on "View a Wedding" in the left-hand panel. Choose any wedding that has the "free viewing" icon next to it, and click on the names of the couple in order to watch it. If a video starts, then you shouldn't have any problems viewing Your So-Called Friends' wedding.

2. deleted: blah blah blah troubleshooting It is highly recommended that you either watch on a high-speed connection or pay to download the wedding.How conveeeeenient that I can pay to download!

3. deleted: more instructions blah blah

4. Even though you aren't able to personally attend the wedding, interesting you should say that, because I wasn't actually INVITED to the wedding you can let the happy couple know of your love by having us deliver a toast or a gift to the couple on your behalf. Again, how convenient! Thank you for making it easy for me to drop some cash on this Click on the couple's names, and scroll down toward the bottom of the page, where you will see the links to order a toast or a gift. If you order a toast we will deliver the message that you write, along with a fresh-cut rose, to the couple directly following the wedding. Likewise, if you order gifts enough in advance for us to process the order, we will deliver them to the couple after the wedding (Usually even 10-15 minutes is enough time for us to retrieve the crappy gifts from the crappy gift vault, but the sooner the better). Please call or e-mail if you have any questions.

5. deleted: more instructions for the technologically challenged

As you prepare for the wedding, we hope you will join us in wishing the happy couple all the best in love and happiness for their marriage. We want to do what we can to help you feel included, too, even if you are a continent away. We want you to feel included - even though you AREN'T actually. Please do not hesitate to call or send us an e-mail if you have any questions or need help viewing the couple's video. It is our pleasure to assist you.

Enjoy the wedding!as you sit in your stained jammies peering at a choppy low-res picture on your 4-year-old Dell. Did you remember to send a gift? No? Click now! Really! We mean it! Cash would be best!

Best Wishes,

Chapel of the Exploitation

*********

My spam subject lines have been getting more and more graphic and disturbing. Another reason not to have kids: so you don't have to explain when they ask you "Mom, what's 'Latina teen g3tting it in 3 h0les' mean?" as you are reading your emails.

Today's was kind of funny though: "My peenis is always hard and is able to move without interruption!" It leads me to want to know: Always? Really? Isn't that kind of inconvenient at the grocery store? And "able to move without interruption"? Do you usually have interruptions? What kind of interruptions? How long do they last? Is it really sort of a paralysis, or what?
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