At the checkout stand, I wonder
- Does anyone actually believe that you can lose 42 pounds in 2 weeks (without surgery)?
- Why do magazine articles have to give you an odd number of hints? "7 Ways to Better Blowjobs" "Nine Shortcuts to a Cleaner Baby" etc.
- Why do women's magazines so often feature a cover with a 12,000 calorie dessert AND a diet plan?
- WHY NO RED TIC-TACS?
- Does the fact that I like Tic-Tacs make me 78 years old?
- Is there some kind of Kardashian of the Week club? I can't keep all these skanks straight!
- There's nothing quite as cheering as Stars Without Makeup.
Two things: I was just in the grocery store a few nights ago, and the woman behind me commented to friends about one of the magazine headlines, which was (really!) "Lose 22 pounds in a week." I told her that, coincidentally, that's how much I'd lost in five months.
ReplyDeleteAlso, my women's studies/journalism professor says the fatty recipe/diet article is absolutely intentional -- they fatten you up so that you feel you NEED them for the diet, and create this shame spiral of neediness.
Re: Tic-tacs, no. If Tic-tacs are wrong, I don't wanna be right.
ReplyDeleteRe: Kardashians, LOL.
I miss The National Enquirer. At least i got to keep up on who is having Elvis' alien love child this week.
ReplyDeleteWhat is a Kardashian and why are they famous? Do i even care?
I have to confess that I probably enjoy the 'Stars Without Makeup' bits more than I should.
ReplyDeleteYes. You are 78 years old. And so am I, because I can't stay out past nine anymore.
ReplyDeleteKeeping up with the Skankdashians!
ReplyDelete