Lesson

I have been over reading the newsletter at the Human Kindness Foundation again. Bo Lozoff writes the newsletter. He is one of my favorite people on earth, a real spiritual seeker, someone who is honest and kind and humble.

He says

There’s an old Native American saying that I quoted in We’re All Doing Time: “If you seek to understand the whole Universe, you will understand nothing. If you seek to understand yourself, you will understand the whole Universe.”

This principle applies in a related way to Bible study and the study of any religious principles. If we seek to memorize chapter and verse, if we seek to discuss and argue about abstract passages that have endless interpretations, we will understand nothing. But if we take a few words of any bible and pray on them, wrestle with them, struggle over them for years, however long it takes to experience their meaning in our hearts, then we will understand the whole bible from which those few words come.

My favorite few words from A Course in Miracles, ones that I have been trying to learn deeply, have been "Everyone teaches, and teaches all the time."

Meaning that no matter what you are doing, you are teaching. If you think you are bullshitting the world by putting your best face on, the world still knows. The world can see you right through the act. You might fool them for a while, but eventually you will show your true colors.

This is a lesson I obviously have to work on a lot. I think I am so good at putting on a show. Many times I even fool myself. For a while. But honesty is honesty and lies are lies, and there is a lot of distance between the two and the distance is filled with pain and shame and ugliness.

The less I lie to the world, the more likeable I am to good, honest people. And the rest shouldn't concern me, should they?

I'm sick of my lying face. It hurts to peel that crap off. But if I want to be really alive, I can't be afraid of who I am and I can't be afraid to show others who I am. Do you really want to know?

BlogHer

Check the little button to the right - I will be at BlogHer in Chicago! Woo hoo.

AND hotel reservations are already made at the W. I thought I had better be a little more organized this year than last, when I got THE LAST BlogHer all-events pass because I waited so long.

I can't wait to meet you all. Who is going?

Why is Wednesday the best day of the week?

On Wednesdays all the major newspapers have food sections. For someone who loves food like me, well, that makes for a happy hour of online reading.

New stuff up at Linkateria (a wacky Obama/Apple 1984 commercial mashup) and True Employee Confessions.

And have you checked out the WOOP WOOP NOT SAFE FOR WORK AT ALL project from a bunch of your favorite bloggers, Desperately Seeking...Something? Warning: lots and lots of photos of naked parts that should normally be covered by several layers of clothing, if people knew what was good for them. Funny stuff.

I can always find something to complain about

Everyone hates jury duty. I thought I hated jury duty.

Then I got assigned to Federal district court jury duty, which is a whole different ball of wax. First, you are on call for a month, though you only have to call in once a week.

Second, it is in the heart of downtown Los Angeles.

Third, they pay me over a hundred bucks a day with mileage, plus I get wages from work.

I had to call in tonight and I already had tomorrow's jury day planned: Take the train down and arrive in gorgeous Union Station. Grab a bagel at the station cafe (I never eat bagels anymore - the carbs! the carbs!). Take my laptop (they have wireless) and read blogs or watch DVDs. Find something fabulous for lunch at the Grand Central Market. And collect my $107.40. All good.

But they don't want me. I'm rejected. Off to work with no bagel, no blogs, no DVDs and certainly no extra $107.

Waah. Feel my pain.

Doggone

Crap on a cracker. How much does it suck that the only brand of dogfood that Goldie will eat, the $1.21 per can Nutro Max Chicken and Rice chunks, is on the recall list?

I have been feeding my dog very expensive food that may have been killing her (pounding head on keybkdhr23899efboard).

Goldie is pretty hilarious about food that she does not like. She goes to the bowl, sniffs the food, then proceeds to loudly lick the edges of the bowl while gazing balefully and meaningfully in my direction.

"Hey, human," I can almost hear her saying. "You can see that I am HUNGRY because I am at my bowl. Yet I plainly reject this slop. Can you perhaps get off your ass long enough to get me some decent chow?"

Dr. Jean Hofve is an expert in animal nutrition and now I feel bad I didn't take her advice. Maybe I will start baking chickens again. Yes, I absolutely see the nuttiness in the concept that I will not feed myself or those I love meat, but that I will cook chicken for my dog. I never claimed to be sane.