14 March 2007

Who do you think you're foolin'?

So last night I'm shopping in Lane Bryant for some jeans. You don't have to tell ME I'm shopping in the fat chick's store.

I know I am. I have not forgotten that here 28 is not a waist size but a regular pants size like 8, 10 and 12 are elsewhere.

I'm not that upset about it, because it actually feels kind of good to be somewhere where my size is among the tiniest things they sell. I'm practically svelte among the Lane Bryantites. I can actually get things that fit in "petite" at Lane Bryant, because petite is a length, not a size.

Which is why I think it hilarious and sad that they have this new way of folding jeans on hangers. The jeans hang as if you are looking on them from the front, but they pleat in the sides to reduce the width by half.

When I first saw it, I thought "WTF? Are these size 2s or what?? In Lane Bryant??"

Then I picked them up and saw the folding trick. Aha. The mystery of the missing yardage, solved.

Note to the display manager: don't. Just don't. Seeing how you think my thighs should look doesn't make me feel better about my size. Let Lane Bryant be the one place on earth where I can let my thighs romp wild and free. I have the whole rest of the mall to remind me how bad I should be feeling about my body.


Amanda said...

I know this is weird, but I actually kinda miss shopping there. It was so easy. The lack of selection was actually comforting.

Now when I go in there to buy bras, the sales people completely ignore me. Like I don't even exist. I may have lost weight, but I'm not THAT thin.

Christina said...

I love Lane Bryant. Not only am I on the smaller size range there, I prefer their shirts for maternity shirts over real maternity shirts - they're longer, so no risk of belly showing.

Anonymous said...

I've just always been really puzzled by the way women's clothes are categorized. Petite means...uh...short. Women's sizes means...large. Juniors...means teenagers with 12-year old bodies. Where am I in all of this? Size 8-10. 5'8"...regular person. I can never find me.

Jhianna said...

They also love to do that clip the dress in the back thing so that the shape is hourglass. Maybe some women who shop in Lane Bryant have hourglass figures, but not this one. It never looks like that on me.

claire said...

yep, this is why i love shopping there, too. i am the smallest size and like amanda said, the limited selection is actually comforting. how sad is that.
regular stores are overwhelmingly extensive. gah... i must have serious problems.

btw - the cool kids call it "LB". i know.

Anonymous said...

Amen! While I love the LB, they're still trying to compete in a market where skinny is golden. I got a LB catalog in the mail yesterday and as I was looking through it, I found myself swearing at the pictures of the women. They're heavy for models but THEY'RE NOT PLUS SIZED! They're NORMAL!

However, I didn't see one jutted hip bone that looked as if it could cut a holidasy ham from the bone, and it made me appreciate Lane Bryant all the more.

meno said...

Many years ago, Lane Bryant did tall clothes and large clothes. So i used to shop there and feel positively skinny. Now they just have the larger stuff, so i don't go in there anymore.

I have to wear men's jeans. Try stuffing your thighs into those. I look for these key words "Loose fit."

I however, am not loose.

Lisa said...

I hate when companies do that... With the thighs.

Anonymous said...

They do the same thing with the jeans at Avenue. It's amazing how small a size 24 looks when it's folded like that.

My problem is that although I am Lane Bryant petite sized on the bottom, all of their tops must be cut for tall people because they hang down to my knees!

Suzanne said...

Your comment about petite being a length not a size really hits home with me. Brilliant. I used to have many problems buying clothes a few years ago (before I lost 40 lbs.) because petite means things are just slightly shorter, but as you say, also smaller. Since short people are obviously never overweight. I swore that some day I would open a store for people like me and call it Short and Fat so people would know that I understood. Husband told me it would fail because no one wants to shop at a place with the word Fat in the name, but I would have done so gladly.

Anonymous said...

I think far too many of us feel bad, regardless of where we're shopping or how they fold the jeans.

My grandmother, bless her, is short and fat. She bought maternity pants because they fit. I wish I had as good of an attitude toward shopping as she does.

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