Puzzling Evidence?

I went on a business trip and took the Red Stapler with me because I knew I would be meeting up with some bloggers and I thought it would be great to get some photos.

When I was unpacking upon my return, I found the stapler had suffered in transit:


The following Monday, we found that we were in danger of being laid off.

I started this blog and got the stapler when I first started that job.

Coincidence?

What. The. Heck

How could I leave that grim & depressing post up for so long? My apologies. My excuse is that I have been BUSY - I think I have done seven news articles in the past five days PLUS job hunting.

Ok, a bullet point post will have to do.

• I'm not going to say much but cross your fingers for my job hopes. There may be something good around the corner.
  
• Things with the folks are even MORE worrisome. I'm pondering next steps. I wish my siblings all lived in my town so we could sit down over coffee, because they are all smarter than me.
  
• I have done exactly nothing for Christmas so far.
  
• My ex-job supplied me with 2 months of career search services, which I very much appreciate. That is mighty decent of them. There is something to be said for working for a SuperMegaHuge Giant Corporation.
  
• Any advice on whether to buy Quark or InDesign if I want to do some design work again? I have Illustrator and PhotoShop. I worked in Quark 40 hours a week for, oh, a billion years, so I am more familiar. What are all the cool kids using?
  

Ok, off to do more reporting. Mo' money, baby.

The Layoff Chronicles: All the Children are Above Average

We had our last phone conference call with our Vice President, who was also laid off. Half the team is leaving, the others are staying.

Rachel: I had to drop off the call early to meet with a headhunter. Did anything happen after Scott spoke about [some ongoing project]?

Suebob: Well, there was a kind of tearful goodbye from Shelly, and then we got trophies. Oh, man, you missed getting your trophy.



Rachel: TROPHIES?

Suebob: Yeah, we all got trophies. Just like soccer - all the children get trophies, even the losers.

Rachel: The wha? No they didn't. SHUT UP! YOU SUCK.

Suebob: [rolling on the floor laughing at my own excellent joke].

The Layoff Chronicles: The Circle of Life

Background info: Every December at work we do an all-hands-on-deck project that has traditionally taken five of us on our team about six weeks to accomplish. Meanwhile, dozens of other people across the company are also frantically working to accomplish their pieces of the project, and a wonderful woman named Debbie stitches them all together at the end to make one magnificent finished piece.

The problem is that this year, only two out of five of us will be around to do the project.

Because it is so complex, we begin planning in November. Thus, the emails begin.

*********************

From: Person, Patty
Sent: Thursday, November 12, 2009 1:28 PM
To:[Lots of people]

As work for the *Massive Gigantor Project (name redacted)* gets underway, we would like to have a kick-off meeting with the sponsors. More materials will be provided prior to the meeting.

Please let us know if you are unable to attend our kick-off meeting. Debbie and I will determine the best approach to follow up with you to review information.

Thank you.

Patty Person

********************

From: Person, Patty
Sent: Thursday, November 12, 2009 2:10 PM
To:[Lots of people]

The attached PowerPoint presentation is for our Kick Off meeting on Monday.
[Massive Gigantor Project Kick-off - 11-16-2009 v4.ppt]

Regards,
Patty Person

******************

From: *My Director*
Sent: Thursday, November 12, 2009 2:13 PM
To: Person, Patty
Cc: Suebob; New V.P., Debbie
Subject: RE: Kick off 2010 Massive Gigantor Project

Patty,

My position and Suebob’s have been eliminated. The remaining team is moving under *New VP Name*. You have appropriate representatives from the remaining team for your meeting, but we will not be participating.

New V.P. and Debbie will have to let you know how XXX team will participate with Massive Gigantor Project moving forward.

Thanks,
My Director, who rocks

***************

From: Person, Patty
Sent: Thursday, November 12, 2009 2:16 PM
To: My Director; Suebob; Debbie

Director,
I am sorry to hear about you and Suebob. I wish you the best.

My position was also eliminated. I am including Debbie on this email, as she will be overseeing this work going forward and will need this information. Thanks again!

Regards,
Patty Person
Strategy Leader

****************

And with that, I started howling with bitter laughter. What else can you do? Cry? I'll bet that is what poor Debbie is doing.

Getting it right, getting it wrong

The comments section of my local newspaper's online edition is filled with the most retrograde, racist, xenophobic goobers to ever type a sentence. I hesitate to even log in because I always end up feeling so downcast about the state of humanity after reading what they say.

Any time an article mentions someone with a Latino last name or a subject even tangentially related to homosexuality, the chunderheads go into full zoom-zoom crazyhead mode. Illegals! Gays!

Hundreds of comments. I mean, look. Enough said.

Anyway, when they aren't flipping out about "the illegals" or "the gays," the rabblerific comments section is full of entries about how the newspaper can't get anything right.

I have been working my way through "The Wire," the greatest TV show ever (period, end of story). Season 5 is all about journalism. Oh, it is good. It also gives me the most painful pangs of nostalgia for the newsroom. I can barely stand it.

In one scene, the city editor wakes out of a dead sleep and goes and calls the copy desk to ask about some facts he inserted in a story. He is panting, thinking for sure he got the numbers reversed. Some little minor thing about the tonnage of shipments at the port last month, but he is losing his mind over it.

It reminded me so much of my life when I reported every day. I did that ALL THE TIME. And I asked people at my workplace - I work with a bunch of former news people - if that had happened to them, and they all had stories. Lots of stories.

We had all awakened wildly, thinking for sure we had pooched a fact, something that no one else would notice, but that we would know.

I remember one night when I lay there, tossing and turning until I couldn't stand it anymore. I woke up the exMrStapler, who was an attorney.

"If someone is being held for questioning, are they 'in custody'?" I asked.

I was freaking out because I had said "in custody" and I wasn't sure that was precise enough. ExMrS thought for a bit.

"Was he free to go?" he said.
"No."
"Then you could say he was in custody," ruled ExMrS.

I had awakened sweating because I cared. I didn't care because I would get in trouble or because we would have to run a correction (though that was horrible, too). I cared because I believed all that crap about writing "the first draft of history." I cared because facts are facts, and they are supposed to be right. I cared because I was part of a long tradition of reporting the news, of separating out the true from the false. I really, really cared in a way I never cared about anything before or since.

Those goons in the comment section honestly believe that journalists don't give a hoot, that they screw up and blithely go about their day. Maybe there are some who do. But I have just never met one, and I never was one. I can only hope that they, some day, somehow, care about something as much as I cared about getting the news right.