A hand across the fiberoptic cable

I met Amy at BlogHer 06 and we hung out by the pool. She is one of those women who looks far younger than her age - I'll bet she still gets carded - and is cute and blonde and athletic-looking.

But I still didn't feel like smacking her! Amazing. She had this cool personality that made me feel like one of her girls, not the large, sweaty stranger that I most certainly was (that was the year my thighs got chapped from walking around in a skirt all day, oh, yeah, good times, people).

She quit blogging a while ago, and I was sad to see her go. Yesterday she popped up in my comments section and it felt like getting a surprise gift.

I went over to her blog and found that she has had a recent miscarriage. She returned to blogging for the same reason many of us do - to learn, once again, that we are not alone.

If you would, please go visit Piece of Work and give Amy the virtual hug she needs right now. We are all in this together.

Talk Amongst Yourselves

I got such a thoughtful and concerned anonymous comment on my last post that I thought I would copy n paste it out here so others could comment. I wonder this type of thing myself all the time.

I don't want to be a downer but I have serious and sincere question to ask the mothers/fathers out there "When you decided to have a child, did any of you angst about what kind of world they might be inheriting?" Again, this is a sincere question.

My husband and I have really seriously considered having children. Nothing would give me greater pleasure than to see some version of my husband in another person -- with all the excitement and passion for learning and living. But the thing I fear most is the fear they may face knowing the pain of water, fuel, and food (etc.) shortages, a chaotic and mad world where people aggressively and fiercely hoard what little resources they have from others.

Sometimes I fear for myself as to what life may be like as I get older but I am absolutely terrified of the idea of what this could mean to my child. Yes, I understand adoption is an option and one that we are seriously considering but out of curiosity how did those who took that leap into parenthood get pass this mental or emotional hurdle? Again this is a serious and sincere question and on that I come back to again and again but am deeply afraid to ask my friends who are having children for fear or really alienating them.

All I can say on the subject is that these concerns were part of my decision to remain childless. I am, I admit, a big chicken. I don't know how other people do it.

Anne Lamott said something like "Being a parent means never having another peaceful night -" because of all the fears that come along with having children.

Discuss.

Pink is for girls and macho is for boys

Buying presents for my newest (not yet born) great-nephew's baby shower and struggling to get one of these big bags off the hanger:


Woman: Will you get me one of those bags, too?
Suebob: Here you go.
Woman: Oh, no this is for a girl. I need one for a boy.
Suebob: I'm getting mine for a boy. Look, it is Noah's Ark. Boy elephant, girl elephant.
Woman (making a face): For a boy? No. This is for a girl.
Suebob: I think it’s a little early to start imposing gender roles on it, don’t you?

No, I did not say that last line. I stole it from Monty Python's "Meaning of Life". But I should have.

I mean, WTF? Are boys banned from hearts and rainbows even before they are born? How vigilant do we have to be to make sure our boys don't turn into homosexuals? Because isn't that what this is all about? You give them pastels in infancy and the next thing you know, they are rollerskating down Main Street on Pride Day in assless chaps, waving a rainbow flag and chanting "We're here, we're queer, because Auntie gave me the wrong wrapping paper"?

That would be so wrong. Because 1) all chaps are by definition assless so the term is redundant and 2) That chant does not even rhyme.

Say Hello

My friend "Sullivan" has just started a blog and is tremendously excited about it.

Please go pay her a visit at Letters from Sullivan.

She is a 24-year-old writer, lesbian in a committed relationship, ballroom dancer, website designer and general all-around woman of many talents.

Thanks for making her feel welcome!

Take a chill pill

Is it just me, or is our magical world of Blogadelphia extra angsty today? Holy cats, people, CALM DOWN. Until then, I will be praying for your cranky butts.