16 September 2007

A Whale of a Good Time

Because my life is so much more fun and interesting than yours, I had the following conversation with my friends yesterday:

SB: Did you hear about the dead whale?
Friend 1: Yeah!!
Friend 2: We should go see it tomorrow after church.
All: Yeah!!

Yes, people, we actually made a date to go see a dead whale. We are THAT kind of cool.

And because my friends are 24-hour party people, they just could not wait until this afternoon to go see the whale. They actually went out at 2 a.m. in search of a 70-foot whale carcass, which proved surprisingly elusive. They never found the whale last night and we met up to go out today.

The first beach we stopped at was whale-carcass-free. We asked around and some surfers pointed us a few miles north. When we saw 2 giant yellow excavator machines, we knew we were there.

And when we got out of the Magic Bus and began gagging on the smell, we REALLY knew we were there. I mean the kind of "Oh help me Lord, I am going to lose my morning muffin RIGHT NOW" feeling. A 70-ton whale that has been sitting in the sun a few days...well, there ain't nothing else exactly like it.

We followed our noses down to the beach, hoping that our scent receptors would soon be overwhelmed and quit working so that we might stop feeling so pukish.

When we got down to the sand, a ranger and this very strange, perky woman informed us that the whale had already been buried. The perky woman (short curly hair, floral dress) took a little too too much pleasure in telling us how the whale had looked as the excavating machines flayed it into pieces small enough to bury.

When we extracted ourselves from that weird coversation, we hiked back up the hill to the car, both happy to be out of there so we could return to breathing normally, and disappointed that we had missed the spectacle.

Why did we go to see a large, dead mammal? I think because whales, dead or alive, give us a sense of awe. There is something sacred or magic in seeing that there are these giant, mysterious creatures sharing the planet with us, just a few miles away.

But though we missed the whale, it didn't miss us. For the rest of the day, the smell of dead whale floated around us like a disgusting, ghostly presence.


In honor of our departed cetacean friend, here is a petition to get the Navy to stop killing whales with their sonar (Though this whale was probably killed by a boat, many others beach themselves after sonar experiments). Please click the link and sign. These are magnificent mammals, and they deserve better than to be driven crazy or killed by loud underwater sounds. Thanks, Kevin Charnas.

I also watched the Dodgers win
(I was trying to perch "Think Blue" on my hands, but after standing in the sun and sweating for about 10 minutes, we gave up)

and took Goldie to the beach to chase birds

What did YOU do this weekend?


Alex Elliot said...

I was laughing when I read your post about trying to find the whale. Of course I should say that I have never gone looking for a whale so what do I know, but I was thinking that it's probably pretty hard to miss. Thanks for the link to the petition.

FunnyGal KAT said...

Some people go to Sunday brunch. You... you went to see a dead whale? Sounds weird, but I really like your explanation about why you did it.

No dead animals for me this weekend. I smelled like paint fumes from working on my house. So I think you win the prize because dead whale obviously trumps paint smell.

Anonymous said...

I just had to come back and say....after reading this post last night, I went to bed and had a dream about dead whale hunting!!

Haha! Sicko.


Lisa said...

Abbey dog is so envious that Goldie got to chase birds on the beach.

And wow. Dead whale smell...Can't imagine what that smells like but I'm sort of glad I now live in a landlocked state. heehee

Blog Antagonist said...

That's funny...I was just reading a book where the characters make a similar pilgrimage and I was thinking that would be one hell of a stench. But I would totally go!

That's a great cause, and I'll be sure to check it out.

QT said...

Wow - now that is an adventure! I had a fun weekend on the motorcycle, tho I bet you and Goldie enjoyed better weather than I did.

OhTheJoys said...

Uh... I think you forgot to post a photo of the ranger, friend. Ahem.

SUEB0B said...

OhTheJoys - unfortunately my ranger looked nothing like your ranger. This was an older, stockier gentleman.

Anonymous said...

That's hilarious (and awful!) about the dead whale. I bet the smell was simply rotten - did you learn your lesson? :)

Suzanne said...

Yeah, that was a little more gross than I thought it would be. I can't imagine how awful it reeked before the poor critter was buried.

I love the picture, by the way.

Christina said...

I have to admire you for searching out a dead whale. And I can't even imagine the smell a dead whale would give off...ugh.

dizzle rivera said...

Poor dead whale.
Second dead whale in as many weeks off the Cali coast. Sign the petition, everybody!

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