24 March 2010

What is next? A plague of frogs?

Today I went outside to sit on the steps in the sun and pluck my eyebrows.

This is the type of thing you can do at 10 a.m. on a Wednesday when you are funemployed. Beats working.

I don't know if it is age, or hormones, or what, but my eyebrows have begun bushing up at an alarming rate. One of these days I fully expect to awaken looking like Andy Rooney.

But that's not all. Oh gah, that's not all.

While I was peering into the 10x mirror and plucking and plucking and plucking and plucking, I noticed a tiny, thin hair that had gotten stuck to the side of my nose. It was about half an inch long.

I moved my tweezers over to remove the hair.

Ow! It was stuck.

That's because it was attached. It was growing. Out the side of my nose.


What kind of awful new world have I entered where half-inch long hairs can grow out the side of my nose? And here's the best part - I didn't even notice until it was half an inch long.


This is gonna keep me up at night, I just know it.

21 March 2010

A time of contemplation

I was sitting next to my friend Judy in church today when an elderly couple came in late.

They entered noisily and with a great amount of fussing and commotion. After they sat down, the noise didn't stop - they kept talking and trying to get settled.

The first little period of prayer and meditation arrived, and I noted the irony in being irritated while trying to pray. I settled in with a deep breath and shut my eyes, determined to attain Peace of mind with a capital P.

Suddenly the elderly woman's voice spoke close to my ear saying something like "Sank you for..." I was so surprised that I didn't know how to respond, or even if she was talking to me.

I decided my best bet was to keep my eyes shut.

"She's PRAYER," said the man.

"WHAT?" said the woman.

"Prayer!" he said, louder.

"PRAYER?" she asked. "WHAT PRAYER?"

"SHE IS PRAYING!" he said.

That ended the conversation. I still didn't know whether they were addressing me. I just sat there, in perfect, quiet contemplation. That's the kind of deeply spiritual person I am.
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