Grrrrinsurance

I spent the greater part of the day on the phone, trying to make sure my boob tests would be done by an in-network provider with my health insurance.

The place my doc sent me for the mammo was not in-network, which they didn't tell me - why would they? Not their job. It wasn't a big deal for the mammo - maybe an extra $30 or so.

But then they whacked me with the 2-boob ultrasound special - I can hardly wait to get THAT bill.

At the time, they are saying "We need to do this right now" and you are in shock at the idea that your boobs might be trying to kill you and who are you to argue?

This weekend, though, I had time to consider that the ultrasound-guided needle biopsy (ON BOTH BREASTS, PEOPLE. BOTH BREASTS!! BECAUSE I AM OBVIOUSLY A MUTANT FREAK, THAT IS WHY) might be...well...kind of expensive. So I checked my coverage and found that I was about to drop an extra $300 or so if I used an out-of-network provider.

Nuh-uh. $300? That's a ticket to Chicago. To see my sis. No way.

So I spent the day on the phone.

The count:
3 places that don't even do the procedure that are on my health plan website as providers
1 place the guy on the health plan's 800 number suggested that wasn't even a diagnostic center, but a doctor's office
1 completely clueless receptionist who had never heard of a needle biopsy
20 minutes on hold
1 time of getting hung up on
2 calls to the health plan
3 checks of health plan website.
Total: Madness

Simple. Easy. No problem.

My question: WTF do sick people do? Because if I already didn't feel good? If I was going through chemo or something? And I had to make these kinds of phone calls? I would be dead by now.

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