24 February 2007

Attn David Geffen...

...and anyone else who may be trying to call.

I have zero cell phone reception at home right now. Zero. So if you are trying to reach me, leave a message and when I go out I will retrieve them. Or email me at the snackishblogATyahoo address and I will obsessively check my email every 15 minutes (like I don't anyway).

And yes, Mr. Geffen, I think we can deal.

Updated: So. I decided to take Miss Goldie out for a walk and search for cell reception at the same time. Put on my ugly ass yoga pants and ugly ass sweatshirt (a hand me down from my 80-year-old mom - THAT's how attractive it is) to go to the beach.

Drive. No reception. Keep driving. No reception. 2 miles, 3 miles, 5 miles. No freaking reception. We are at about 5 hours with no cell reception. Something is seriously wrong.

So I had to go to the cell phone store in my ugly ass dog-walking clothes to face smirking 20-year-old boys in polo shirts. They took my phone and rolled their eyes and went in the back room to no doubt talk about me. Look, I don't mind being old and hideous - I'm USED to that. Just don't make me feel crazy, too.

Soon enough, my young friends performed some kind of cell phone "master reset" magic, and I got my phone service back, minus my dignity.

Geffen hadn't called though. Hm. Must be busy getting ready for the Oscars.


Anonymous said...

A Publishers clearing house van was in your driveway this afternoon, did they find you?

Anonymous said...

You do know that there isn't any "Mrs. Geffen", don't you? [Hence his support for that dreamy Barack Obama, and not so interested in Evil Frau Clinton.]

Anonymous said...

I feel you on the no cell phone coverage issue

Lynn said...

It could have been worse...you could have run into an old boyfriend while in the cell phone store.

SUEB0B said...

Mr Stapler - I don't want David Geffen to go on a date with me. I want him to buy my screenplay.

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